i'm back :DD

hello,
yeah. one word that i can said to tell u how seniorhighschool life goes. busy.

and also, that's the reason why i seldom update my blog. hh. . .to much homework, trouble, things to do, exams, that's the things that make me stressed. to much thinking and can't be "cuek" is also the reason why. araaahh ! and i've just joined s.o.g in smansa. yeah, that's fun. well, i think thats all for now

Hello, how are u? :)

Yeah, i'm too busy since in senior high school. And also too busy to update this blog. Ergh. . .Ups sorry, my stomatch is too full,wkwkwk.

Well, i feel so many things happened while the time pass us. I feel so much everyday and my mood change easily. . .I know. Sometimes i feel really bad as a human, as a friend, as a junior, as anything as i am. Hhh. . .

I feel uncomfortable with this all. But i can't tell this to anyone. Because i don't know what is the name of this uncomfort feeling. But yeah, my SHS day also have many funny and lovely things. . .I know my life is colorful with this. And i'll try to throw out all the bad things around me. I hope i'll be a good human and kick away any bad side. Sadhu3x, amin, thx god. >.<

Ingin kulihat dia tersenyum lagi.

Aku sedih, aku bingung, aku lelah.

Aku tak mau menyakiti dia. Namun, aku tak mau menghianati kepercayaan mereka. Entah perasaan apa ini namanya. Sungguh menyakitkan untukku.

Menurutku, dia adalah sosok yang lucu dan sangat menghibur. Membuatku bisa menghapus masa lalu. Aku tak mau menyakitinya. Aku ingin sekali, melihat dia yang selalu bisa membuatku tertawa dengan segala tingkah lakunya. . . Aku ingin melihatnya tersenyum seperti dulu lagi. Aku tak suka melihatnya bersedih. Aku tak nyaman melihat dia yang menutupi dirinya dariku. Sebenarnya aku tak mengerti. Apa maksud hatiku ini. Dan aku juga tak bisa, menceritakannya pada siapapun. Aku bingung. Semuanya terlalu membuatku bingung.


Aku selalu menjaga kepercayaan mereka terhadap diriku. Dan aku ingin terus menjaga kepercayaan itu. Namun aku heran, disaat aku sangat butuh mereka, ya, memang mereka ada, tapi segalanya malah terasa rancu. Aku lelah berada di dunia. Karena aku merasa aku tak punya siapapun, karena aku merasa aku bukan siapa2. Aku ingin menolong diriku sendiri tapi aku belum bisa. Aku belum mampu.


Maaf beribu maaf. Aku benar2 tak ingin menyakitimu. Batinku akan terluka melihatmu tersakiti. Namun aku tetap tak bisa menghianati mereka. . .


. . . . . . . . . .

everything about my life since the last time updated this blog.

i cross my senior high day with test, task, test, task, and more test and task. U,yeah, i forgot 2 tell u bout 'GKS XIII'

Yeah, thats a kind of art show by the students of smansa due to the school birthday. There were so much student participate and should take many dispen. The students very2 excited bout GKS. And for the 13th gks, our school invited nidji, rocketrockers, tolbandtol. And operet by teater angin smansa, dance by capoiera smansa, fashion show by smansa model, kpa mandala giri in action, etc. Thats very2 interesting and make the 10th grade, like me as the new comers waits and daydreamed about gks.

But in gks day, i went home b4 all the show finished. I even didn't watch nidji live in action! And also the operet! This make me so sad...but i can do nothing. TT

Next year, i want to watch gks till end! Amin!

2 B continued

GeJe

Cuma prasaanku aja ato memang blog ini makin geje? Wkwkwk. . .Kayakny memang ni blog geje dari awal,deh. . .Yah, karena udah terlanjur, jadi kulanjudkan saja ke-GeJe-an blog ini. Bbrapa hari lalu, udah pembagian kelas permanen (tesnya gila. . .Terutama mathnya). Dan ternyata, aku dapet kelas X.5. . .Bareng Riri~ syalalalala /ohlalala. . .

Tapi pisah dari tmen2 di ALVERONE. . .TT
harusnya ada acara manggang2 di rumah adit hari ini. . .Tp aq gag bisa dateng. . .DX what the. . .
Kmaren HUT RI ke 64, jadi kelasny bru mule hari ini. Dan plajaran pertama yaitu. . .OLAHRAGA. . .Untungny gag jadi lari aerobik di GOR. . .Fyuh. . .XD

oiya, 17 agustus it juga ultahnya Kiss~1. . .Calon anggota angkatan 29, ngisi acara musikalisasi puisi. . .Lgunya D'masiv yang Jangan menyerah. . .Lumayan sukses menurutku. . .Tapi gag bisa ngikutin acara dari awal. . .DX dan gag liat bgian akhir acara. . .DX
habisnya keburu di jemput. . .Pdhal bru aja mau liat yg laen. . .DX

oke. . .Post kali ini sgini dulu,ya. . . :)

- -a

Ma' lovely blog, you're my one and only diary right now. And i just love to write anything on my blog. But sometimes, i realize something. I can't write all of my problem and my happiness. I'm happy with this blog, although I manage it badly xP. But there's many things, which are very complicated. Hope it won't be too long to be complicate. Maybe you'll ask, what is that? Hahaha. . .Don't try to ask question like that, or I'll kill you. . .Bwahahahah. . . Kidding, friend. . .Just need more time, and that can be (maybe) revealed. . .Oh yeah? Just wait and watch for the next scene ! BTW, BBF is on indosiar every afternoon. . .XD so i can watch it without waiting the midnight show. . .XDXDXD. . .Oh please. . .Oh YEAH ! :)

Oh God, i'm confused

Oh god. . ., i really get confused with this all. I never thought about this before. Its really make me crazy and make my mood unstable. I didn't understand. I hate to be like this. If i can't get rid or get entertain of it, how could i feel enjoyable to cross anything? I didn't want to be like this. I want to know the real facts. I want to know the most real facts about that. Don't make me feel that there is any chance, if there's nothing left. If there's someone, who get the chance, and if it's not me, i want to know the facts. I don't wanna keep this anxious feeling, or this miserable feeling, just wanna have merry and joyful memories. Oh god, Isn't that is a simple one?Oh Please. Please. Please... Just tell me the facts, with your smiling face, if there's any chance for me to be there. . .For me To be there. . .Just to be there. . .


Welcome to the next GeJe Post! And bye!